haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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