Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
