It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
