I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
