We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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