You made me cry and you don't even care
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
