I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
