wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
you traded sex for a burrito?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
