bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
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