it hurts more in the daytime
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
