Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize
