Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize
