how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
