I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
The adults are the big ones right?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
