I faked an abortion last night.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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