thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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