So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
My bed smells like the plague
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