don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
