Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
