Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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