Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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