Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
