Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
