I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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