nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
