Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
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