I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
