Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
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