apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
