even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Randomize
