you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
