The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
