Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
