how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
