I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
