spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize