paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Randomize
