508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
