You're so nebulous sometimes
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
