My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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