Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
