I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Four minutes until I can fart!
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
