You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I'm passing your future prison.
he was CRYING into my vagina
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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