I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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