I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Someone signed my nipple.
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