so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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