was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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