I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Shame - the story of my life.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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