I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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