so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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